I do plan on dumping him, but I don't know how. I think I am still with him because I think if my test comes back positive for genital herpes he is the only guy who will ever want me if he did in fact give it to me or I have to stay with him because I may have given it to him. Somedays I feel like I can hand the idea of having herpes for the rest of my life but other days I am not so sure. I am so afraid. Its funny I use to say I never wanted to get married and have kids, but this situation has made me realize how much I want those things and now I may never get the chance. I guess thats life. Funny, as I write this I remember the first time I had sex with him he told me he used a condom but I don't think he did. I am such an idiot. I pray my blood test comes back negative. If it comes back positive life for me will be over.
Since genital herpes affects the private parts, people tend to think that the virus acts differently on men and women. However, the symptoms of genital herpes are very similar in males and females. The most important difference is that the virus can cause complications in pregnant women, who can pass the infection on to their babies. Other than that, there is no such thing as a male or female genital herpes virus, the infection is caused by the same virus in both sexes.
Not every person with a herpes infection actually experiences breakouts of cold sores throughout his or her lifetime or even after initially becoming infected. How often someone has a herpes cold sore outbreak, how severe the outbreaks are, how contagious someone is after infection and how long the sores take to heal all depend on someone’s individual immune response.

In fact, “atypical symptoms” are the reason that so many people don’t know they have herpes. Their reality is nothing like the scary images that pop up when you Google image search the term. Atypical symptoms include things like nerve pain, achy muscles, itching, and tingling. Some women I talked to reported being misdiagnosed with frequent yeast infections or bacterial infections before receiving their herpes diagnosis. “With your first episode, you can have fever, fatigue, and flu-like symptoms,” says Cullins.

Herpes sores usually appear as one or more blisters on or around the genitals, rectum or mouth. The blisters break and leave painful sores that may take a week or more to heal. These symptoms are sometimes called “having an outbreak.” The first time someone has an outbreak they may also have flu-like symptoms such as fever, body aches, or swollen glands.


Herpes antiviral therapy began in the early 1960s with the experimental use of medications that interfered with viral replication called deoxyribonucleic acid (DNA) inhibitors. The original use was against normally fatal or debilitating illnesses such as adult encephalitis,[92] keratitis,[93] in immunocompromised (transplant) patients,[94] or disseminated herpes zoster.[95] The original compounds used were 5-iodo-2'-deoxyuridine, AKA idoxuridine, IUdR, or(IDU) and 1-β-D-arabinofuranosylcytosine or ara-C,[96] later marketed under the name cytosar or cytarabine. The usage expanded to include topical treatment of herpes simplex,[97] zoster, and varicella.[98] Some trials combined different antivirals with differing results.[92] The introduction of 9-β-D-arabinofuranosyladenine, (ara-A or vidarabine), considerably less toxic than ara-C, in the mid-1970s, heralded the way for the beginning of regular neonatal antiviral treatment. Vidarabine was the first systemically administered antiviral medication with activity against HSV for which therapeutic efficacy outweighed toxicity for the management of life-threatening HSV disease. Intravenous vidarabine was licensed for use by the U.S. Food and Drug Administration in 1977. Other experimental antivirals of that period included: heparin,[99] trifluorothymidine (TFT),[100] Ribivarin,[101] interferon,[102] Virazole,[103] and 5-methoxymethyl-2'-deoxyuridine (MMUdR).[104] The introduction of 9-(2-hydroxyethoxymethyl)guanine, AKA aciclovir, in the late 1970s[105] raised antiviral treatment another notch and led to vidarabine vs. aciclovir trials in the late 1980s.[106] The lower toxicity and ease of administration over vidarabine has led to aciclovir becoming the drug of choice for herpes treatment after it was licensed by the FDA in 1998.[107] Another advantage in the treatment of neonatal herpes included greater reductions in mortality and morbidity with increased dosages, which did not occur when compared with increased dosages of vidarabine.[107] However, aciclovir seems to inhibit antibody response, and newborns on aciclovir antiviral treatment experienced a slower rise in antibody titer than those on vidarabine.[107]

However, there is much more to the herpes virus than just chicken pox or genital herpes. For instance, after an active infection, the virus is shed (eliminated) in the urine and feces for up to several months (sometimes years in the case of the cytomegalovirus) after the active infection has resolved. This means the infected person is still contagious, which is what makes this virus so contagious. It can easily be transferred when the patient is asymptomatic.
The herpes virus is probably the most well-known virus after influenza (the flu) or the common cold. What most people don’t know is that this nasty little virus can take several different forms, eight to be exact. The most common form of the herpes virus is chicken pox, which is called varicella-zoster. Herpes simplex is the sexually transmitted version of the virus.
Although the exact cause of Bell's palsy—a type of facial paralysis—is unknown, it may be related to reactivation of HSV-1.[23] This theory has been contested, however, since HSV is detected in large numbers of individuals having never experienced facial paralysis, and higher levels of antibodies for HSV are not found in HSV-infected individuals with Bell's palsy compared to those without.[24] Antivirals may improve the condition slightly when used together with corticosteroids in those with severe disease.[25]
When a herpes outbreak occurs, you can expect cold sores to take about 10–14 days to heal on average. During this time period, the virus is considered to be active, and you should be very careful to avoid direct contact between a sore and someone else. If after trying the natural remedies for herpes described above you still experience frequent recurrences, talk to your doctor for how to get rid of herpes symptoms. Sometimes immunity is suppressed due to another infection or virus, or even as a side effect of taking some medications, so be sure to rule these causes out.
Dr. Charles "Pat" Davis, MD, PhD, is a board certified Emergency Medicine doctor who currently practices as a consultant and staff member for hospitals. He has a PhD in Microbiology (UT at Austin), and the MD (Univ. Texas Medical Branch, Galveston). He is a Clinical Professor (retired) in the Division of Emergency Medicine, UT Health Science Center at San Antonio, and has been the Chief of Emergency Medicine at UT Medical Branch and at UTHSCSA with over 250 publications.
These herpes viruses enter the body through small cuts, abrasions, or breaks in the skin or mucous membranes. The incubation period for herpes simplex infections is about three to six days. Transmission (spread) of the virus is person to person and more likely to occur if blisters or lesions are present. The majority enter after an uninfected person has direct contact with someone carrying the virus (either with or without noticeable lesions). Simply touching an infected person is often the way children get exposed. Adolescents and adults frequently get exposed by skin contact but may get their first exposure by kissing or sexual contact (oral and/or genital contact), especially for HSV-2. Statistical studies suggest that about 80%-90% of people in the U.S. have been exposed to HSV-1 and about 30% have been exposed to HSV-2. Usually, the contagious period continues until lesions heal. Some people (estimated from 30%-50%) occasionally shed herpes virus while having few or no associated symptoms or signs.

Some people experience negative feelings related to the condition following diagnosis, in particular if they have acquired the genital form of the disease. Feelings can include depression, fear of rejection, feelings of isolation, fear of being found out, and self-destructive feelings.[108] Herpes support groups have been formed in the United States and the UK, providing information about herpes and running message forums and dating websites for sufferers. People with the herpes virus are often hesitant to divulge to other people, including friends and family, that they are infected. This is especially true of new or potential sexual partners whom they consider casual.[109]
The herpes virus is probably the most well-known virus after influenza (the flu) or the common cold. What most people don’t know is that this nasty little virus can take several different forms, eight to be exact. The most common form of the herpes virus is chicken pox, which is called varicella-zoster. Herpes simplex is the sexually transmitted version of the virus.
Herpes simplex type 1, which is transmitted through oral secretions or sores on the skin, can be spread through kissing or sharing objects such as toothbrushes or eating utensils. In general, a person can only get herpes type 2 infection during sexual contact with someone who has a genital HSV-2 infection. It is important to know that both HSV-1 and HSV-2 can be spread even if sores are not present.
Since genital herpes affects the private parts, people tend to think that the virus acts differently on men and women. However, the symptoms of genital herpes are very similar in males and females. The most important difference is that the virus can cause complications in pregnant women, who can pass the infection on to their babies. Other than that, there is no such thing as a male or female genital herpes virus, the infection is caused by the same virus in both sexes.
The causes of reactivation are uncertain, but several potential triggers have been documented. A 2009 study showed the protein VP16 plays a key role in reactivation of the dormant virus.[71] Changes in the immune system during menstruation may play a role in HSV-1 reactivation.[72][73] Concurrent infections, such as viral upper respiratory tract infection or other febrile diseases, can cause outbreaks. Reactivation due to other infections is the likely source of the historic terms 'cold sore' and 'fever blister'.
Some people experience negative feelings related to the condition following diagnosis, in particular if they have acquired the genital form of the disease. Feelings can include depression, fear of rejection, feelings of isolation, fear of being found out, and self-destructive feelings.[108] Herpes support groups have been formed in the United States and the UK, providing information about herpes and running message forums and dating websites for sufferers. People with the herpes virus are often hesitant to divulge to other people, including friends and family, that they are infected. This is especially true of new or potential sexual partners whom they consider casual.[109]

JJ 55 is right. We are almost always here, I always look at my thread at least 3 times an hour on my days off and I am on here more when I am at work. It's ok to be scared. I still cry about it. I am on antibiotics right now, I go back to the doctor on Tuesday for more humiliating actions. (Pap smear) I will find out about daily medications then. Oh crap sorry I tend to babble. We are here for you, but you will also need to read everything you can get your hands on. I just met JJ55 last night and it seems that we tend to do the same threads together. I am here for you as well. Soon we will have our own little group...
A doctor will base a presumptive diagnosis on information provided by the patient and on the physical examination. The characteristic appearance of the herpes sores leaves little doubt about the diagnosis, so the typical appearance of the sores is key to the diagnosis. This appearance helps distinguish oral herpes from oral thrush, shingles, gonorrhea, and syphilis. In addition, chapped or sunburned lips can resemble oral herpes, but the tissue stain (Tzanck smear, see below) shows no virus-induced cell changes. Further testing is usually not necessary but is sometimes done.
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